Because a lapdance is always better when the stripper is crying...
You know you're from Las Vegas when:
1. You have no idea what a scarf does, but think it looks good
2. You know how to get to any casino on the strip without taking Las Vegas Blvd
3. You know where the natural history museum, art museum and zoo are.
4. You can now predict where the construction signs will be misleadingly placed.
5. Stopsigns and red lights mean very little
6. The last time you went to the strip, your cousins were in town last summer
7. You become nocturnal between the months of April to October.
8. You know the seasons: Really hot, 2 weeks of nice, not so hot, 2 weeks of nice.
9. Your favorite chocolate is Ethyl M.
10. When you go to different cities, you're amazed things aren't open after 9 pm
11. You've never seen a closed gas station
12. You can get hard liquor any day of the week, any time of the day.
13. When arriving home from vacation, the slot machines in McCarran are comforting
14. You are still asked "smoking or non?" when you go to out to eat
15. You laugh at people playing the slots at 7-11
16. You have no idea how a lottery works
17. If you do, you know the shop at stateline that sells the tickets.
18. Your most prized possession as a Nevadan is your blue and white licence plate
19. You know the spaghetti bowl has nothing to do with food
20. You know never to merge right when driving north on I-15, it'll end anyway.
21. You think a pile of rocks is a nice lawn
22. The term Lake Las Vegas doesn't seem redundant in the slightest.
23. You remember the ugly lion
24. You give directions to your house based on location of closest casino
25. You need to walk through a casino to see a movie.
26. You go in circles through McCarran on purpose
27. You can spot a tourist from 3 miles away
28. Limos are an everyday sighting
29. You laugh at people taking pictures in front of the "welcome" sign
30. You don't own an umbrella
31. Sixty degrees is cold enough to wear a jacket
32. You can wear pants in the summer and shorts in the winter
33. You've never HAD to pay for parking.
34. You are outraged to pay more than 9.99 for prime rib and a lobster tail.
19 credit hours later...
So in order for me to graduate on time I needed to add 7 credits to my schedule this semester. Not just any seven credits, mind you, seven credits that fulfilled fun Liberal Studies requirements. It has been a fun selection process that has left me with the following fun-filled classes:
Elements of Intercultural Communication-Steve took this class online at Rio Salado and said it wasn't too bad.
Best part: No due dates!
Worst part: I have to remember how to be PC after so much time with Nate.
Technical Writing-Writing for the business world (resumes, memos, etc.)
Best part: I'll be all set for the corporate sphere!
Worst part: 38 writing assignments. Yee-haw!
Wildflowers of the Grand Canyon-Very self-explanatory title:
Best part: Only 5 weeks long! So much better than Birds of the Grand Canyon...
Worst part: I can only pretend to care about wildflowers for maybe 6 minutes, so 5 weeks will be tricky.
So as not to leave you hanging...
After my big CLEP post, I never told everyone how I did... There was a reason for this. I got the "bad karma" score, exactly 1 point short of what I needed, and exactly the score needed to get 8 credits prior to last fall. In any case, there was debate all the way up the university chain about whether to use the new standards, which are standard across the state, or to use the scores set forth in my catalog. I have basically just been holding my breath for the past three weeks unsure of what to do.
Well, today I got my answer. The statewide standard cannot be argued and therefore I get 0 credits. Bummer. But what can you do, it was a fair decision. It will make my final semester slightly more "interesting" but I am determined to graduate on time without incident.
I realize in the grand scheme of things this is just a minor setback, far less than others have had to overcome. But that hasn't stopped the stabbing pain in my chest and the little voice in my head that keeps saying "Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!" At least it's just one voice now and they're not all arguing in French anymore... Please join me next week when my blog title will be changed to "Schizophrenia".
Moving Forward...
I tend to be a dwell-er. I dwell in the past, I dwell on things that don't work out, I dwell on issues that I have absolutely no way of changing. In some ways it's good because it means I learn from my past and my mistakes, but it also means that I put a lot of pressure on myself to try to fix things it's too late to change. I'm not sure if it's maturity and wisdom (haha) or maybe just exhaustion but this semester I am trying my best to keep looking forward.
So my mantra for this semester is...
God, grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
the courage to change the things I can;
and the wisdom to know the difference.
It's amazing how four little lines can present such a challenge. At least for me, that seems impossibly hard... I think it's also the prayer AA uses at their meetings, so if I fail at my mission miserably and hit the bottle, at least I'll be prepared.
In other news, thanks to everyone who made my birthday so special! I had a full week of celebration in various places with various people, and it was mostly fabulous! I am really luck to have such amazing family and friends to share in my celebration.
Ok, I'm tired of being nice and positive so I'm going to end this here. Good night!
Update
Just so I don't leave all of you hanging, the doctor at UCLA told my dad that as long as his current medication was working, there was no reason to do a bone marrow transplant. Additionally, there is a new drug being used to treat his type of leukemia that is showing a lot of promise, so if they decide to do a drug study, he'd be on the top of the list to participate. All in all good news.
I take my CLEP test tomorrow. I have never been more scared of a test in my life. Even though everyone keeps telling me I'll do fine, it's just not reassuring because no one really knows how much I know or how hard the test will be. More than anything I just want people to tell me that it will be OK if I
don't do well, someone to tell me I'll still be a smart person even if I don't know French. Oh well.
A bientot mon amis! Merci pour tout les pensees bon. Seacrest hors.
New direction...
While I appreciate Steve's call for all of you to send me good thoughts about my French CLEP, I'm going to request that you temporarily redirect all of your good intentions for tomorrow. My Dad is going to UCLA Medical Center for a consultation and we're all hoping he learns only good things about possible treatment options. So if anyone could think positive thoughts, pray, or project happy aura beams his way, I'm sure every little bit would help.
In other Dad news, I'm working on setting him up a new blog (tentatively called "INCITE") at http://revmah.blogspot.com. The basic idea is that it will have all the wisdom but without the pressures of "cyber ministry." So hopefully that'll be up in the next couple weeks if you want to check it out.
Ok, I think that's it for me. Seacrest out.
